Dealing with a Shortsighted Boss

Beverly FlaxingtonBeverly Flaxington is a practice management consultant. She answers questions from advisors facing human resource issues. To submit yours, email us here.

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Dear Bev,

Our lead advisor tells us every year that we will all sit down together and plan for next year. Then, December comes. It is a really busy time for us both in the office and personally. He uses this as an excuse every single year (I have been here for five years) and so we never do the planning. We just go into next year with the same outdated approaches we have always used. Is there a way to help him see the importance of sitting down together and planning? It’s his firm and I get that, but he is the one who keeps bringing up that we need to do this!

S.T.

Dear S.T.,

If only we had the ability to easily get others to see the error of their ways! In this case, it sounds to me like your owner is saying what he thinks you want to hear (and may, deep down, know is right for him too), but for whatever reason he doesn’t want to open the discussion so he creates a reason why it can’t happen.

He is offering up a form of resistance. People resist because of a number of factors – most are usually based in some sort of fear. There is a great quote by international mediator Douglas E Noll that I usein a lot of my trainings: “The truth is that we are 98 percent emotional and about two percent rational.”

What does this mean? It means we approach people with logical, reasoned arguments about something we care about only to find they have an emotional reaction to what we’ve said. Your leader is likely harboring some sort of negative feelings about this exercise - it could be fear, mistrust, lack of confidence in the people he needs to count upon (yes, this could mean you and your colleagues), underlying concerns he doesn’t don’t want to voice (i.e. if you pose a great idea and it costs money, how would he say he doesn’t have the funds?), concern about changes that are agreed to by the group but not by him and on and on. The idea of planning sounds “logical” but there is likely some underlying emotional reason he offers resistance. Remember, resistance can be very passive; ignoring someone is resistance!